Day 63 early afternoon

Dear Lyle:

You may wonder why I'm counting the days at the top of the blog.  In reality that's not the only place I mark time since you were arrested.  It's in my calendar, and I keep a log by my bed.  Since I haven't gone longer than a day, maybe two without talking to you in 27 years and just under 3 weeks without seeing you, this is a way to tell how long I can actually go without seeing or talking to you.  It's hard. I don't know what I'll do when it hits 100.  I can't believe it's been 63.  63 days of preschool seems so long, and 100 days an eternity, but it's actually been 63 days. 

In the meantime I completely lost most of December and all of January.  I don't know where I placed them, or where they went, but they're gone and I can't remember anything about them.  I think that's why this blog is so important to me.  I don't want to lose any more months. 

This morning has been a blissfully quiet day.  It's Xander's last school day off track, and I only have 3 little girls.  They have played so well that I've taken the morning to do some much needed paperwork.  I've been entering 2011 receipts into kid pro and filing child care papers.  It hasn't helped the mess on the desk, but at least I'm getting some things done that i've put off for far too long.

I went to the bank and put in money that Carol had given me to pay for Xander's plane ticket to Kentucky.  And, I did Caylee bus runs, but other than that, I've been sitting in front of paper work, going as fast as I can.  Maybe I'll tackle the desk tonight.

Today was the day I started changing some passwords on money accounts.  The SLC police department was hacked by some big time awful hackers, and everyone has confirmed they have a lot of information.  So, my little paranoid, conspiracy theory self started getting a little worried, because you've been in the police system and I didn't want to take any chances.  So, I started with my bank account, which you saw almost immediately after I changed it, and verizon.  I did Verizon because I was paying my cell phone bill and was putting in some important bank info.  I also changed pay pal.  I'm going to be changing a lot more financial passwords as I go along.  I'm hoping you're doing the same thing. 

So, why were you checking my mm account so often?  Do you need money?  Do you think I'm out on shopping sprees?  Are you just ideally curious?  I was just curious about that.  And, of course, I can't ask you.  So, I'm hoping Brandon will get back to me soon, cause I asked him to ask you for me.

After our one and only snow yesterday, it's such a gorgeous day.  These are the kind of days I'm happy that I get to go outside with the kids.  Sunshine on my face, when it's not blistering hot, makes me happy.  And, I need all the happy I can get.

Shauna